If you are not kind

He was upset… until we discussed this.

My son had been “done wrong” by someone. And it seemed to be haunting him and keeping him in a state of “unhappiness.”

“How could he do that? What is wrong with him? Why would he do that? How could someone be so mean?”

Over and over… and over he replayed in his mind what had happened. The disgust on his face was noticeable… and ongoing.

For kinda… way too long.

Then. I think in an effort to connect and be validated, he turned and asked me, “Has someone ever done you like that, Dad?”

When I replied with “Sure… many times over.” He seemed surprised.

So, with a smile on my face I shared with him a few occurrences of times in my life where I’d been treated FAR less kind that what he’d just experienced.

Now… MORE SHOCKED he said… “But you don’t seem mad about it. Even though some of that was recent. What the heck, Dad?!”

That’s when I shared with him something I’d heard a long time ago. Something I always try and remember when treated unkindly.

What had I heard and what did I tell my son? Simply this…

“If you are not kind to unkind people, you are ONE OF THEM.”

Harsh I know. And he felt it.

Initially he scowled. “I don’t like that.” he proclaimed.

“I didn’t like it either.” I said. “But think about it. And see what happens to you.”

He scowled again. But I could tell he was thinking about it. REALLY thinking about it.

“If you are not kind to unkind people, you are ONE OF THEM.”

Not too long after he came to me and said, “You know what, Dad? I don’t want to be ONE OF THEM.”

My reply was simple. “I know, right?”

“And you know what else, Dad? I’m already feeling better because I am NOT going to be ONE OF THEM.”

Again I agreed. “I know, right?”

He smiled at me and said, “I think I figured out one of your SECRETS, Dad.”

“It’s not a secret, son.”

“Not anymore.” He happily replied.