A few days ago was my 59th Birthday… and THIS happened.
I was out of town. 1,877 miles from home. Away from my family. As I woke up in a quiet, empty hotel room I knew it was my Birthday. But I had planned for this.
I knew I’d be alone. I knew I’d feel a bit off. Shelly made it a point to celebrate me on my Birthday and I’d come to expect it. And LOVE it. She knew how to make me feel special and nothing in my life could compare to Her love.
But it’s been a few years since she has passed. I’d done this three times since her passing and was sure I could manage with a smile on my face.
So I did. I smiled and stretched and headed to the shower. I was a bit behind schedule already so I cranked up the water and got ready to pop in.
That’s when I was met with a REAL CHALLENGE. At least for me.
Listen, I am a pretty low-maintenance guy, but I do love a hot shower in the morning.
And… there it was. NO HOT WATER.
“Please”… I said out loud. “Not today. Not on my Birthday. Maybe it’s just taking a few moments to warm up.” I considered.
Nope. A few moments later and still freezing. So I looked up and pleaded out loud to God. “Please. Not today. Not on my Birthday.”
I stretched my foot into the water and recoiled immediately. I could have sworn it was ice-water.
That’s when I knew.
“I don’t have a choice. I’ve got to do it.” I said out loud to myself, “Suck it up, Kyle.” And tears welled-up in my eyes as I considered the challenge I must face.
“Be a man. Be tough. Stop being a sissy.” I puffed my chest out through tears as I stepped into the misery of a cold shower.
And IT… WAS… MISERABLE. But not just because of the freezing cold water.
All the pain and suffering about Shelly not being here with me and my family on my Birthday came flooding out. I can confirm misery loves company because I went deep into the recesses of Hell. (A frozen Hell.) Every emotion of overwhelm slammed me with every drop of cold water.
I sobbed as I showered.
The good news? You could probably guess… the shower was over with fast. Lightning fast. And… the cold water seemed to wash away my tears… and my fears … and my pain. And… I think somehow my tears may have warmed the water just a little bit. But not much.
The better news? I wrapped up tight in a few warm towels and blow-dried myself with (almost Heavenly) warm air.
And by the time I showed up to the event I was attending, I was back to my typical, buoyant, happy self.
Lately for some unknown reason, my mind has been focused on how my Heavenly Father has blessed me with SO MANY gifts. One gift in particular is the gift of buoyancy. And believe me… I’ve needed it.
I’ve done nothing to deserve it. It’s just a gift I’ve been given for some unknown (only God knows I guess) reason. But I am SO grateful.
And then this morning… I was given a gift I all-too-often take for granted.
I took a long… HOT shower. And it was… OH… SO… GOOD!
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